Category Archives: Uncategorized

Moving on

It’s official: I’m moving on.

From WordPress. I’m pulling this blog off of WordPress to its own website, the fabulous and amazing…

STUFFMAKESSTUFF.COM!

Hoorah, hoorah, hooray.

What does this mean? Well, this is the last post I’ll be making here on WordPress. So say goodbye. Also, if you’re subscribed to my WordPress account, go subscribe to the new website instead!

The new site will feature the blog, the podcast, and a whole new community of adventurers who have a passion for living each day to remember.

All in all, this move will be amazing. I hope to accomplish so much more with the new site, from the weekly blog posts to some amazing podcasts featuring even more amazing people. And who knows? Maybe more. For now, however, head on over there and check out the new adventures I’ll be having.

Peace.
Hayden

Friday: “The Cheerful Cherub”

“The Cheerful Cherub” is the title of this little poem I found in the back corner of an antique shop in downtown Modesto:

My future seems uncertain.
With problems I’m perplexed —
Oh, well, I’ll still look forward
To the future after next.

Keeping looking forward, people.

Peace,
Hayden

When you don’t know what you should say

Apologies for the lateness of this post. I had no idea what to write about today, so I waited until I felt inspired. That inspiration waited until 11pm to arrive, and now I’m writing this.

Let’s think about that: if I didn’t have anything to write about today, would I write? Yes, because I have made a commitment to myself and you to write something here every week. It’s a goal of mine for 2014, and so I need to stick to it. Even if I don’t know what to say, I will force myself to say something because I promised I would. But let me make this explicitly clear: that is an exception. In all other areas of life (besides, perhaps, when you are required to give a speech), when you don’t have anything to say, much more often than not it is better to not say anything at all.

We as people talk a LOT. More than 500 million Tweets are posted every day. On average, that’s six billion, seven-hundred ninety million words. That’s just over ninety thousand, eight-hundred sixty-five copies of Mary Shelley’s Frankenstein. That’s a lot of words, and that’s just Tweets, almost all of which are completely unnecessary. So why say them? Taking captive our thoughts, and the words that come from those thoughts, is a lost art, and one we all need to consider taking back.

It’s remarkable to me how much harm comes from simply saying something when you shouldn’t. Take my case, for example: when it came out that my ex-fiancé was sleeping with my best friend, people were shocked (obviously). And most of them had no idea what to say. How do you respond to something like that? Do you offer condolences or advice or Bible verses or personal experience? What do you do? What do you say? In my opinion, saying nothing is better than saying something when you don’t know what to say.

Because, especially when someone is hurting, words can be the most important things. Important: as in, they can help towards healing. Important: as in, they can utterly destroy a wounded soul. There were people who, when they heard what happened, told me things along the lines of, “Everything will okay in the end. Everything works out for good.” And even though those words were so true, they hurt because they were not what I needed to hear. In fact, the people who simply said, “That [insert expletive here…probably some derivative of the f-word].” and gave me a huge hug as I laughed at their bluntness — those were the people whose words meant the most. They weren’t intrusive, they weren’t insightful; but silence can be such a gift to people whose minds are reeling with the noise of catastrophe. Just having a person there to come alongside and listen and breathe in silence can be so restorative to that wounded soul.

Today, I didn’t know what to say here. I thought about it all day long, but had no words. Perhaps in the instances when our brains are quiet, it’s best our mouths should be too. Because a well-placed silence can be just as comforting as a well-placed word any day.

Peace,
Hayden